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Sex and the Church in the City May 31, 2007

A Predicament of Forgiveness Proportions
by Brian Thomas

“At that point Peter got up the nerve to ask, “Master, how many times do I forgive a brother or sister who hurts me? Seven?” Jesus replied, “Seven! Hardly. Try seventy times seven.”
Matthew 18:21-23 (Message)

Question for church leaders? What do you do if a formerly convicted child molester tells you he would like to start attending your church? How do you break it to your congregation? Do you let him in? Do you send him packing? Do you trust him? Do you set specific security guidelines for him, or trust that he is a changed man through Jesus? This is the predicament a local San Diego church has found itself struggling with over the past couple months, and it has reached the attention of local and national media outlets. I’m sure this isn’t the first time this has happened, and it certainly will not be the last, but it has found its way into my backyard and got me thinking about the nature of forgiveness.

The March 17th issue of the San Diego Union Tribune tells the story of Mark Pliska. When he moved to the area last December, he told the pastor of a church that he hoped to attend that he was a registered sex offender. Pliska said in an interview, “My reason for doing this was to keep myself safe and the church safe. I didn’t want to go to church keeping secrets. It takes too much energy to hide the past.”

Pliska hoped to find support, but found himself embroiled in a battle that have Christians asking the same question Peter asked Jesus: “How many times do I forgive someone who sins against me?” or in other words, “How deep should our forgiveness go?” Pliska believes the Lord has forgiven him and he wants the church to forgive him, too. In late January of this year, after visiting this particular church for a few Sundays, the pastor introduced Pliska to the congregation and asked him to tell his story. The response was so emotional and varied that Pliska agreed not to return until the church came to some consensus on the difficult issue.

Here are some of the responses:

“They don’t break the law while they’re here, and they show themselves off the property after they’re done – sure, I have no problem with it,” said one congregant who asked not to be identified.

“I would oppose that strongly,” said another local. “I would do anything within my power as a church member to make that not happen.”

“I think Jesus said we have to forgive everyone, and I would certainly welcome him into my church, but we have to be aware that he’s there,” said Julie Villano.

I’m not a member of this church, and I’m sure there are some particulars not open to the public, so I will not pass judgment. I sympathize with their concerns over safety and children, and applaud them for at least taking some measurable steps forward. After all, Mr. Pliska has been rejected outright by other churches in which he has sought refuge.

A predicament like this does, however, say much to a watching world that is quick to lay the “hypocrisy” verdict upon us whenever we act contrary to Jesus’ own ministry of reconciliation. After all, most of them are okay with Jesus, they just don’t care for his followers when we are unforgiving. I think sometimes we forget that Jesus died for sinners! The same Peter that struggled with this forgiveness question in his early ministry found comfort in the fact that the entire Bible testifies about the forgiveness found in Jesus Christ. “All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name” (Acts 10:43).

I recently wrote a review of the book, Stripped: Uncensored Grace on the Streets of Vegas, by Pastor Jud Wilhite. In it he tells many stories of God’s transforming grace that have reached people like Mr. Pliska. Jud says, “Uncensored grace is what you get from a loving God when all the religious types have gone home, and every last hope for your own effort has blown up in your face. Uncensored means that as wide and deep and high as your mountain of personal ruin might get, God’s transforming grace is always wider and deeper and higher.”
I’m not saying it is easy to forgive and forget the past. But Jesus sat and celebrated life with many not unlike Mr. Pliska, and the religious members of his day were none too happy with that fact. He let a whore wash his feet. He held a profound mid-day healing conversation with a Samaritan adulteress no one else liked. He ordained a tax collector to the ministry. To these and more, he said, “Friends, your sins are forgiven” (Luke 5:20), which includes you and me.

Mr. Pliska is an older man that has served his time, sought therapy, feels profound guilt and remorse for his sins, and is a member of a weekly support group. “I’m just looking for a fair shake and a chance to start a new life,” he said. “That’s all I’m looking for. I hope the community is willing to do that.” I don’t have all the answers, and I’m sure I haven’t thought through all the implications of this matter, but I hope that if someone like Mr. Pliska were to call me on the phone and ask if they could worship with me on Sunday, my church could pray with Jesus: “Father, forgive us our trespasses, as we also have forgiven our trespassers” (Matt. 6:12).

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